I have a confession to make…I really want a daughter.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my two boys. They are my world. But, as a true girly-girl, I dream of the days I can take a little mini-me with me on shopping trips and spa days. But it’s not just the fun stuff, or even the clothes, that make me dream of having a little girl. It’s the special bond that is shared between mother and daughter. My mom was my best friend. The relationship that we had was unlike any other. She was my rock, my confidante, my sounding board, and my partner in crime. Having lost my mother five years ago, I long for that relationship. I can’t imagine never experiencing that with my own daughter.
I know what many of you are probably thinking – there’s no way to guarantee the gender of your baby. Unless we want to shell out 10k or more for gender selection, but at the moment we need the money to put the two kids we have through college! Trust me, my husband and I are well aware of this. If there was some kind of pill I could take that would guarantee we would conceive a girl, I would’ve gotten pregnant years ago.
The truth is, we are perfectly content with two kids. Our boys are amazing. As they grow up and become more independent, life gets a little easier each day. We can travel with them, they can buckle themselves into their own seats, they can shower and get dressed on their own, and they are starting to enjoy independent play. Every stage with children is different, but we are starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Our kids can fend for themselves and we can enjoy them as people!
Since there is no guarantee of us conceiving a girl, having a third baby has been a tough decision to make. Financially, adding another child would put a strain on us. As two working parents, we are already stressed out enough. Plus, we know that there is always the possibility that a third child could be a boy and we would love him with all of our hearts, no matter what. But, it will always linger in my mind…what would it be like to have a daughter? After reading about the family in Michigan who just had their 14th boy, I am apprehensive about having another baby. I can’t imagine having three boys, let alone 14!
Some people may say that I shouldn’t have a third child just to have a girl. Or that I am being selfish and should be happy with whatever blessings we get. Trust me, I know all of this. In fact, I was concerned about writing this post and putting it out there into the internet universe, knowing what some people may think.
But the truth is, I am not afraid to admit that I want a girl. I want a daughter to share all of the special moments that I got to experience with my own mom. Only time will tell what happens for us and if we expand our family at all. I know the clock is ticking and I am not getting any younger. We just have to wait and see what happens and hope to see pink in our future.
