Is improving your child’s sleep at the top of your resolution list for 2015? January is always an extra busy month for my practice – it seems that lots of parents resolve to make family sleep a priority in the new year.
The trouble with resolutions (as most of us know all too well) is that they’re easy to make but hard to carry out! Making changes is hard work and can feel overwhelming, which is why so many of us end up not getting started at all or quitting before we’ve followed through.
When it comes to our children’s sleep problems it can be tempting to procrastinate or convince ourselves that they’ll resolve on their own – and once in a while they actually do. Most of the time, however, sleep issues don’t resolve without parents actively working with their children to make things better. The good news is that solving sleep issues isn’t usually as difficult as parents imagine, and the pay off is so great that it’s worth every bit of the effort invested in creating change.
If you’re ready to start working on improving your child’s sleep but don’t know where to begin, start by asking yourself the following questions:
1. Is my child getting enough sleep?
The chart below reflects the average amount of sleep that children in each age group require to be considered well rested. These numbers are just averages. Some children require more sleep – some less, but if your child is getting significantly less sleep than the chart suggests it’s a good idea to take a closer look at your child’s schedule and make an effort to accommodate their needs.
| Age | Total Sleep | Night Sleep | Number Naps |
| 1 week | wide variation | wide variation | on demand |
| 1 month | wide variation | wide variation | on demand |
| 4 months | 15 hours | 11 hours | 4 to 8 |
| 6 months | 14-1/4 hours | 11 hours | 3 |
| 9 months | 14 hours | 11-1/2 hours | 2 |
| 12 months | 13-3/4 hours | 11-1/2 hours | 2 |
| 18 months | 13-1/2 hours | 11-1/2 hours | 1 |
| 2 years | 13 hours | 11-1/2 hours | 1 |
| 3 years | 12 hours | 11 hours | 1 |
| 4 years | 11-1/2 hours | ||
| 5 years | 11 hours | ||
| 6 years | 10-3/4 hours | ||
| 9 years | 10 hours | ||
| 12 years | 9-1/4 hours | ||
| 15 years | 8-3/4 hours | ||
| 18 years | 8-1/4 hours |
2. Is my child sleeping at the right times?
When your child sleeps is just as important as how much they sleep. Too much awake time between naps, too late a bedtime, or too early a wake up time can cause your child to become overtired, which will make going to sleep and staying asleep more difficult. If you’re not sure about the timing of your child’s sleep take a look at my November 2014 FCMB post on naps – it will give you an idea of typical awake windows by age and help you to determine if your child’s current schedule might benefit from some tweaking.
If you’re wondering how to determine your child’s ideal bedtime, start with your child’s typical morning wake up time and count backwards the number of hours of sleep they require at night. For example, a typical six month old needs approximately 11 hours of sleep at night. If your child wakes for the day at 6:00 am, counting backwards 11 hours from 6:00 am tells you that they need to be sleeping by 7:00 pm to get their nightly requirement.
3. Is my child’s room sleep friendly?
It’s true that some children sleep perfectly well in bright rooms and noisy environments, but most sleep better in a dark and quiet space. Because light shuts off the production of melatonin, the hormone that helps us to feel drowsy and fall asleep, black out shades are a worthwhile investment, especially during the summer months when it’s light out until 9:00 pm. Be sure to keep mobiles and other stimulating toys out of the crib and bed – your child needs the message that it’s time to sleep, not play. Also, make sure that the room isn’t too warm. 68 to 72 degrees F is considered by most experts to be the ideal temperature to promote sleep.
4. Does my child have a consistent bedtime routine?
A consistent bedtime routine not only gives your child the opportunity to wind down and relax before bed – it’s also comforting and reassuring. Have you ever wondered why your toddler asks you to read the same book over and over again? It’s because the repetition and structure helps them to feel safe and secure. Try not to rush through the steps of your bedtime routine, and don’t be afraid to skip a step on days when you’re running behind schedule. Skipping a step is better than rushing through it. The best routines are simple and calming, and don’t drag on too long. 45 minutes is a good time frame for a bath, pj’s, books or a song before lights out.
5. Does my child know how to put themselves to sleep?
Although in the early months of life many babies need our help to fall asleep, as they develop we need to step back and give them the opportunity to do it themselves. If we don’t – If we teach them that the way they fall asleep is by being rocked, walked , bounced or fed at bedtime – then it’s unrealistic to expect that they’ll be able to put themselves back to sleep when they wake up during the night. For most of the families I work with, helping their child to develop this important skill is the key to better sleep.
Parents often doubt their child’s ability to learn a new way of falling asleep, but the reality is that healthy, developmentally ready children are remarkably adaptable and learn quickly when parents are ready to teach them. If you’re ready but not sure how to go about it, ask for help. A qualified sleep professional can help you to create the right kind of plan for your family.
Sweet Dreams, and Happy New Year!
Alison Bevan – Sleepytime Coach
Certified Pediatric Sleep consultant – The Center For Advanced Pediatrics
What are your family’s sleep goals for 2015? Let us know by commenting below!
