“Mooooooooommmmmm!!!” Doesn’t it just cut right through you? That screeching call for you that sounds like the most insane emergency but really it’s just something like, “Where are my shoes?” or “Oh. Just checking if you were still here.” Each time you sit down, chances are your relaxation will be short lived before one of your kids calls out for you. Love them as we may, our kiddos can make us BONKERS!
Thankfully, we moms have a way of explaining things to our children that keeps the peace for everyone in the house. Sometimes. Other times it’s full on chaos and everyone loses it, including mom!
I asked around my circle of mom friends and we came up with quite a few things that we all say and then cried laughed together at the meanings behind them.
Here are a few:
- “I’m leaving right now!” (I am going to angrily stomp away and wait in the car while you get it together and meet me out there.)
- “I already said no.” (Are you crazy/dumb/deaf?!)
- “I said no snacks before dinner!” (If I just worked a full day and then rushed home to make dinner only for you to push it away and tell me you’re full from cheese crackers, I will FREAK OUT!)
- “Lights out in 5 minutes!” (Please just pass out so I don’t have to answer any more questions or read one more book.)
- “Be nice to your brother.” (Pease don’t kill each other or make me take one of you to the hospital.)
- “Daddy will be home soon.” (WHHHYYYYYY isn’t daddy home yet?!)
- “I’m going to count to five.” (You’ve reached the limit and I will scream if you don’t start listening now.)
- “Maybe later.” (We are never going. Period.)
- “We’ll see.” (No way on Earth!)
- “Sure.” (I am totally not listening but giving you the illusion that I am.)
- “You need a time out.” (And I need a break right now!)
- “Don’t make me say it again/I’m NOT going to say it again!” (Please don’t make me say it again…I know I will.)
- “I don’t care.” (Of COURSE I care! How could I not care?! But you are bothering me so I am saying whatever will make you stop.)
- “You’re ___ years old and kids who are ____ years old can do that by themselves.” (I’m too busy/tired/just don’t want to. DIY, kid!)
- “Wow, that’s such a great story!” (Dear God, will you ever stop talking?!)
- “It’s broken/lost.” (I couldn’t stand that toy so I finally threw it out!)
- “I’m on the toilet. Can I please have some privacy?” (I am playing on my phone in the bathroom and just need five minutes of peace.)
