This year, I’m taking a break. 2017 was a crazy roller coaster of a year for my family.
Any thought that we have control in life, that we can plan things, that if we’re careful we’ll only hit minor surprises- all those illusions are gone. If I I’ve learned anything this past year, it’s to take a break when you can so that you can recharge before the next uphill climb.
It’s obviously not possible to take a break from everything all at once. Some responsibilities (parenthood, work, chores) allow only for short breaks. Yet, we can decide to take longer, even permanent, breaks from habits and behaviors that no longer bring positive energy into our lives. Here’s a list of things I intend to take a break from in 2018. I I hope it inspires a similar list for you!
1. Judgment
Lately, I’ve been giving negative thoughts too much space, and I intend to try and break myself of the habit. Judgment of myself and others, self-doubt, and a more cynical view of the world are some of the side effects of living through the trauma of having a very sick child. I found myself losing patience for others complaining about problems that seemed comparatively unimportant or annoyed by people prioritizing things that didn’t seem necessary.
I may see things through a different lens now, but it doesn’t need to be a negative one. Everyone is dealing with their own unique family- with its own set of personalities, interests, and needs. It’s more important to focus on what’s working for our family than to judge others for the decisions they are making.
2. Feeling guilty
I often avoid asking for help or taking a break from the stresses of everyday life. Since being at home is my full-time job, I feel guilty leaving behind my responsibilities for others to take care of (especially if we have to pay someone to help). However, taking breaks is a good thing for everyone. I come back recharged and refocused on what’s actually important, the kids have fun with someone else, and I realize that taking breaks is not such a big deal after all.
3. Comparisons
One of the best ways to take a break from the comparison game is to take a break from social media. It seems harmless to check in on what friends are doing, but as I continue to scroll, the tendency to compare what others are doing to what I’m doing becomes too easy. It starts to feel like everyone else I know has a designer wardrobe, a hot mom bod, a pristine home, and a vibrant social life.
It’s better to unplug and catch up in real life than to watch what others are doing from my couch. It also allows me to give myself a break from self-judgment. If a clean home, a rigid workout routine, and a fun wardrobe don’t realistically fit into my life right now, that’s ok! It doesn’t mean it’s forever.
4. Anxiety
As the past year has proved, we can never really prepare for the curve balls that life throws our way. The least expected things can happen and take over our whole life. Rather than worrying about what could or might happen, or doubting the decisions we’ve made, it’s much healthier to live in the present moment and enjoy the good things that exist even in the worst of situations.
This year, I’m taking a break from the few things I can control so that I leave room for more positive energy.
