As many will say, grief changes with time. The waves of grief come and go, but just like the ocean, they will never stop.
Dealing with the grief of not being able to have a neurotypical life with my son and then not having him physically in my life over the past 11 years has shown me first-hand how grief works. There is the loss of not only my son but all the milestones he missed out on, what I’ve missed, and what we’ve missed as a family.
Recently a friend sent me a picture of her son getting ready for the fifth grade moving-up ceremony. Of course, I loved it, and it was so exciting for them to experience this milestone. Then the social media feeds were flooded with all these beautiful pictures celebrating the end of elementary school. I realized I wasn’t quite ready for it because we should have been there. It was another missed milestone.
On the last day of school, I was walking by a celebration for the fifth graders moving on to sixth grade with my friend and our little girls. We smiled and waved, and one of the moms said, “Oh, you guys will be here soon!” My smile quickly faded because we should have been there.
