I’ll start this off short and simple: my kids are spoiled.
On one hand, they are spoiled in all of the right ways: they have a roof over their heads, plenty of food to eat, and more love to go around than they could ever hope for.
On the other hand, they are spoiled in all of the wrong ways: they have too much stuff, and at the ages of five and three, have no idea that most kids don’t have the same. This reality is never more evident than after yet another holiday season of excess.
Now, before you judge me (though I hope you’re not), my husband and I grapple with this problem every holiday and birthday season. The offenders are usually the grandparents, mostly my family, as I am an only child, which leaves our two children as their only grandchildren to dote on. As I write this, weeks after the holidays, we still have gifts left unopened, none of them purchased by my husband or me.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I am thankful beyond measure for my doting family. They are full of endless love for all of us and continue to provide for us in ways I will likely never be able to repay.
However, here we sit in Fairfield County, Connecticut, the land of the Haves and Have-Mores as well as one of the nation’s largest wage gaps. My kids frankly don’t need any material thing they don’t already have. What they do need are opportunities to reflect on how lucky they are, self-awareness to be thankful for the bounty of things they do have, and regular opportunities to give back to those who have less than we do.
We work on these things every day (acts of kindness, no-gift parties, saying what we are thankful for each night, and the list goes on). However, sometimes I feel as if all of the effort we put into raising thankful children is nullified when they are showered with gifts on holidays and birthdays.
I hope that one day I will be a grandparent too. I’ll be ready, willing, and (hopefully) able to shower my grandkids with financial love. But I like to think that I’ll reign myself in when I remind myself of the years I spent as a young parent, literally digging out from under the pile of gifts thrown all over my house by overstimulated children. Only time will tell.
