Your Quarantine Binge List

Well. Here we are. Socially isolating, self-quarantining, social distancing, and living a real-life version of Bill Murray’s “Groundhog Day.” Making each day a little different within never-changing surroundings can be a challenge. We have done countless homemade scavenger hunts, learned to draw with famous author and illustrator Mo Willems, organized and re-organized my son’s at-home classroom for optimal Kindergarten efficiency, and even rearranged our furniture to switch things up. 

One thing that has definitely been keeping all of us sane is the wealth of content to choose from. Suddenly, I find myself watching shows that had been in my queue for years. I put the Kindergartner to bed, put the baby on the boob, and binge the stress away.

Interestingly, what seems like a solitary activity – staring at a screen for hours on end – has become the Great Uniter. We are all connecting and bonding over our mutual fascination for Joe Exotic and Carole Baskin. We all watched in awkward horror as Jessica from “Love is Blind” dove deeper and deeper into a wine-filled shame spiral. And the memes. God bless the memes. I am not ashamed to say that “Tiger King” memes have gotten me through several sleepless nights. 

While we have no physical water cooler over which to bond, we have the internet. Netflix is hosting “watch parties,” and people are having Zoom happy hours to binge shows together. So, grab that remote and get invested in the next great part of our collective consciousness. Because what the world needs now is more memes about sardine oil. 

Tiger King – Netflix

If you haven’t already binged this short seven-episode fever dream, stop everything and get lost in the world of Joe Exotic, a gay, gun-toting, sequin-wearing, mullet-rocking, country singing aspiring politician/reality star/big cat breeder/zoo owner. It is like the world’s most beautiful train wreck and the perfect distraction from the actual train wreck happening all around us.

Love is Blind – Netflix

The show everyone was obsessed with before “Tiger King” was like, “hold my beer.” In this reality dating show, single people have “blind” dates, holding conversations behind a wall and seeing if love is possible without ever actually seeing each other. Lucky for them, everyone just so happens to be really, really attractive, so when they are finally allowed to see each other after their proposals, they happily embark on the next stage of their journey to see if they can make it work in the real world before saying ” I do.” 

Schitt’s Creek – Hulu and Netflix

This half-hour comedy, which has had a hardcore cult following for the past few years, has been on many people’s watch-list (including my own), and now is the perfect time to see what the hype is about. Featuring comedy legends Catherine O’Hara and Eugene Levy, the show revolves around the Rose family, a group of completely out-of-touch, eccentric millionaires who lose everything and end up living in a tiny, podunk town. Like a reverse Beverly Hillbillies, but with better catchphrases. 

Shrill – Hulu

SNL star Aidy Bryant stars as a journalist who is trying to master body positivity, being the perfect girlfriend, thriving in a male-dominated industry, and what it means to be a perfectionist as a wholly imperfect young woman. There are only two short seasons, and Bryant is a star who will make you simultaneously cringe and laugh.

The Circle – Netflix

In this social media version of “Survivor” meets “Big Brother” meets “The Bachelor,” contestants, who are isolated in their own rooms and not allowed contact with the outside world (how meta!) try and win “Influencer” status by conning their fellow contestants into voting them as most likable and popular. Some are actively catfishing, posing as insanely attractive models to try and win the game, some are using romance to win votes, and some are Shooby. 

The Entire Bravo Catalogue – Hulu

Everyone who knows me knows my love for all things Bravo, and if you have yet to fall in love with the Housewives or yachties or Shahs or Sur’vers, then now is your chance, since Hulu has nearly every season of their repertoire available for streaming. Might I suggest starting with the OG Real Housewives of Orange County? 

Honestly, there is so much content that it’s impossible to be caught up on everything. Whatever it is that you’re watching, I hope that your popcorn is salty, your wine is aerated, and your candy is plenty.

What are you bingeing to get you through your quarantine?