“You should put something on her feet, no?”
“You’re not giving her eggs already, are you?”
“My son’s pediatrician said…”
These are just a few of the inquiries and suggestions that I’ve received recently. While they’re coming from well-intentioned individuals, they often leave me frustrated, and in the past, they would have me questioning my Mama Bear judgment.
When you’re parenting solo, whether by choice or circumstance, it can be difficult to find your confidence. Everyone has an opinion, schedule, doctor, and everything in between that they want to share or comment on. Over time, I’ve learned that NO ONE knows your kid better than you. And while I can appreciate the value of each suggestion, I also want to do things my way because…I can!
Here are my top 5 tips for parenting confidently when you’re doing it on your own.
Tip #1: Trust your instincts.
All too often we (meaning human beings) are easily influenced or swayed by the opinions or beliefs of others. As mothers, however, it’s imperative to trust our natural instincts and learn to recognize the value in our intuition.
Tip #2: Set boundaries with friends, family, and even strangers!
It’s okay to tell your sister that you can’t make it over for taco night because your kid needs the comfort of their home that evening. And it’s okay to ask someone at the grocery store to give your baby some space if you recognize signs of distress or simply feel it can be a health risk (uh, hello COVID).
Tip #3: Gather some evidence.
What do you know to be true about yourself and your ability to parent? Reflect on times of success and appreciate the moments of challenge. In doing this, we can reinforce the positive beliefs we have about ourselves and who we are as, “Mom.”
Tip #4: Remember that perfection is an illusion.
Yet find comfort in the idea that you ARE the PERFECT parent for your child just by being present, loving, and consistent.
Tip #5: Accept that it IS hard, for everyone.
Parenting is hard, it’s emotionally challenging and physically depleting at times. But, it feels this way whether you’re doing it with a partner or navigating it alone.
Childhood is fleeting and we may miss the small stuff if we find ourselves constantly questioning our parenting.
