“Mommy, I don’t need you…” {and other milestones they don’t tell you about}



Do a quick Google search or peruse through your, “What to Expect the First Year” book and you’ll find a list of milestones to expect. Cooing, using a spoon, walking, riding a bike… but there are other milestones that your pediatrician might not ask you about at visits. Some are gradual, some are embarrassing, some are by choice, and they all just come along with the journey of motherhood.

1. First time your breast milk spills. 
Anywhere. “Don’t cry over spilt milk,” has no place in a pumping mother’s conversation. None at all. Now that I’m on this topic, the first time your husband walks in on you pumping is pretty monumental too…

2. First “free range” shower. I mean showering while little people are not sleeping, in a bouncy chair, or buckled into some other contraption. This also coincides, in my opinion, with safely being able to climb down from any furniture (couches, fireplace, train table). Although these showers are usually short and I use the baby monitor AND keep a line of sight, it’s a step nonetheless.

3. The first time your child is voluntarily helpful. Upon returning from the grocery store the other day, my older son (4.5) opened the screen door, carried in a package that had been left on the step and then went to close the baby/dog gate at the bottom of the stairs. What? Amazing.

4. First blowout in public (especially without a change of clothes). It happens to everyone at some stage. Hopefully yours wasn’t/isn’t on a 8 hour trans-Atlantic flight. :sigh:

5. First haircut without screaming, lollipops, or an iPhone. (I would also similarly include toenail cutting.) Sure the first haircut in general is cute and most people save a lock of that hair taped to a certificate, but life gets a whole lot easier when you don’t break a sweat wrangling them in a salon chair.

6. Hearing the words “Mommy, I don’t need you.” While I know there have been things my son doesn’t need me for, the first time I heard this phrase I nearly cried. Luckily it was followed by a “pleeeeeease help me!”

7. First public let-down. Without nursing pads. Mine was in the sporting goods section of Walmart. I was initially confused. Luckily once I realized what was going on, I took a quick detour through the clothing department and picked up a cute new scarf and a travel size box of Medela pads to keep in the car.

8. Self-toileting. While ‘potty trained’ is a relative term in my books (more on that in a later post), the day that your child goes to the bathroom, flushes, and washes their hands all without announcing each step of the process or asking for help is a day to take note of. The first few times my son did this I didn’t even know.

9. The first time your child mimics you. This can be cute or terrifying. I was headed to a friend’s house to drop something off when I realized I had forgotten it on my kitchen table. I slapped my leg, said the s*** word and my 19 month old did the exact same thing (leg slap included) from the back seat. Yikes.

10. First public tantrum. Child #1 – on the floor of Starbucks before I even ordered. The barista snarkily replied, “venti?” Yes. Definitely. Maybe two.

With so many moments that we mark in a baby book, post on social media or try to remember…what milestones are the funniest, most memorable or unexpected?

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Julie is a full-time 5th grade teacher, full-time mommy, part-time runner and resident of Ridgefield! Originally from Colorado, she grew up in SW Fairfield County and got married in 2008. They spent a few years south of the Mason-Dixon, got a dog, and returned to CT to raise their family. A former collegiate tennis player, she loves staying active and finding ways to get outside with her two boys (Oliver - February 2011 and Miles - October 2013). When she's not grading papers, playing racecars, or training for a race, Julie is trying to cook healthy meals for her (picky) family, keep their golden retriever out of trouble, take photos, stay organized and save some money to buy a fixer-upper.


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