A Letter to My Youngest


youngest oneDear Big Guy,

It’s not easy being the youngest. I might have argued before I had kids that birth order doesn’t matter, but man was I wrong. It matters. It matters a lot.

The truth is that by the time you get to your youngest, especially in a big family, you’re just tired. I’ve read all the baby books a zillion times, I’ve done the mommy and me classes, and played with all our toys. I love being with you, but we don’t do a lot of those things.

Plus, there are a lot more people who need my attention. Your siblings are the greatest gifts to both of us, but they make a lot of noise, a lot of messes, and a lot of laundry. I feel like I’m constantly trying to keep up, and so are you. We’re both tired, so I’m sorry If I’m crabby. Can you imagine that I used to be able to nap with your oldest sister? What I wouldn’t give for a nap with you now! We’d both feel a lot better.

Of course, there are benefits to having a mom who’s been around the block a few times. There are many things I’m not going to stress over: mismatched clothes, later bedtimes, one too many unhealthy snacks, a few extra minutes of screen time…I’ve never been a type-A mom, but you are getting the most laidback version of me there is.

I hope when you look back, you remember the positive things about being the youngest: the constant companionship, the many hands and arms reaching out to help you, the more experienced parents who don’t get worked up so easily. I hope you always feel like these outweighed being the baby and feeling like life is unfair.

I want you to know that even if it feels like I’m distracted much of the day, I see you. I treasure every snuggle and running hug because I don’t get many of those from your big brothers and sisters anymore. I love how goofy, resilient, strong, and independent you are. Would you have been this way if you weren’t the youngest? Maybe, but I think you are right where you’re meant to be in this crazy family of ours.

Love always,


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