It has taken me years to have the confidence to admit that to myself. Oftentimes, I feel like a mediocre mom. I work a lot, and we are a busy family. I am usually running on fumes. I do not have time for crafts or for playing, and we hardly ever all eat dinner at the same time together.
Because I am a teacher myself, my kids know that I most times cannot be the parent volunteer at school events. As much as I try not to, sometimes I forget special dress up or spirit days. I am not at every single baseball game or dance class. I know now that this is something that bothers me more than it bothers them.
I have carried the guilt around, and that makes it harder. A mom can make herself feel guilty about anything: food, clothes, screentime, bedtime, yelling, lack of activities, too many activities. I have realized these things do not really matter to anyone else.
We experience guilt because we want our kids to have it all. We want things to be easier for them than for us. We want to give them the world.
Instead of guilt now, I try to remind myself that I am a good mom. I am a good mom because I have happy children who are well-rounded and enjoy life. They participate in a lot of activities and enjoy being social. They are not perfect; no one is, so why do I expect myself to be?
My kids can see that I try. I am teaching them balance and independence along with self-advocacy. I am a firm believer that the majority of people are doing their best with what they have, so we should all cut ourselves some slack.