Full disclosure: I’m only at the beginning of this journey, and I’m a little bit embarrassed to admit this, but I have stayed safe in my comfort zone for quite some time now. Up until March, all of my days were incredibly predictable. Wake up, drop two of the kids off at daycare, head to work, pick up all of the kids, head to the day’s designated activity, dinner, baths, bed, and do it all again the next day.
Sure, my life was busy. Yes, I was still impassioned with social issues and the state of the world, but at the end of the day, my family and I still had the privilege of living in our comfort zone.
It feels like so much has happened in the four months between March and today. Throughout the state and the country, so many lives have changed. Thanks to social media, we are aware of it all. I don’t wish to be experiencing a pandemic, but I am grateful that it forced me out of my comfort zone.
I’m sure many others can relate to this. In the time spent home, when I’m not breaking up fights or serving up snacks, I have had a lot of time to reflect. It’s mostly been self-reflection. Am I doing enough both inside and outside of my home to make a difference, even if it is just a small one, in this world?
That thought is what prompted the exit from my comfort zone. I kind of always thought I was doing enough – raising socially aware kids, speaking out against injustices, donating, being informed, and living in an economically and racially diverse town.
Once I asked myself some hard questions after reading some books and discovering some Instagram accounts, I honestly came to terms with this not being enough.
It’s not enough because all of those things were actually about me. I was doing them to satisfy selfish needs, to feel better about myself, but still going back to that comfort zone bubble. I am in the process now of unlearning, listening, and paying attention to my implicit biases and being patient with others who want to do better.
Experiencing life during a pandemic and tackling issues such as racism and privilege has prepared me for the future. I am working on being ready to have hard conversations with my children and with my students. They are the generation who will lead the charge. I’m working on preparing my children for dealing with situations that feel impossible – hello working from home with three kids! – and encouraging them to try not to get too “comfortable.”
Comfort zones can be dangerous; this isn’t a time to be complacent.
If you asked me what my takeaway from this change in our lifestyle was back in April, my answer would be the time I get to spend with my family. If you ask me now, it’s time I’m spending working on figuring out what is truly worth my time, on listening to others and wanting to know their experiences.
