Changing My Mindset

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positive mindsetOne of the biggest jobs we take on as mothers is the role of the “problem-solver.” We figure out the routines and schedules that work for everyone in the family. We referee squabbles between siblings and try to keep things fair. We figure out clothes for everyone that fit, food that everyone can eat, and a budget that works for our family.

This year, I have felt overwhelmed by the things being added to my plate. We have all had to figure out what kind of education to provide for our children and how to provide it, whether remote, hybrid, or full in-person. We had to figure out our comfort level with seeing friends and family, participating in sports, and taking kids on errands. We’re constantly balancing the pros and cons of every decision we make, wondering what is best for our family.

As a problem solver, I often imagine worse case scenarios.

What if we start at a new school and our kids hate it? What if we see our friends and one of them turns out to have asymptomatic coronavirus? What if we don’t play any sports this year, and our kids feel isolated all over again?

This mindset is slowly eating away at my confidence. When I imagine every bad thing that can happen, it seems like no decision is the right one.

Recently, a friend asked me, “What are the positive things that can happen if you make this decision?” It’s a subtle twist, but a powerful one. It helps me focus on the potential positive outcomes rather than all the potentially negative ones. It makes the decisions seem less weighted with danger, and the world seem a little brighter. It lets in hope rather than fear.

What decisions are you facing this year? How can a more positive mindset help you?

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