One day a few years ago, my precious little girl, all of about six years old, came over to me and said, “Mom, I want an allowance!” My face scrunched up, and I looked at her quizzically. An allowance?! For a 6-year-old?! Staring at her big grin, chubby little kid cheeks, and her gorgeous ocean blue eyes, I replied, “What do you need an allowance for? You’re six!” She rolled her eyes at me, “Mommy, I want to buy things that you won’t buy for me, duh!”
Wow, just wow. I had gotten used to her rolling her eyes at me. She started doing that when she was about four years old. This though, the ‘duh,’ I wasn’t ready for that. So like many mothers before me (and many after me will do), I responded with the infamous, “We’ll see.”
The Allowance Discussion
I then went to talk with my husband about this. We had just dealt with the Tooth Fairy’s first visit. Wasn’t the $5 the Tooth Fairy left enough for a 6-year-old?! What was she planning on buying?! So, my dear husband and I discussed the whole allowance thing. Of course, when we couldn’t come up with an answer because we are both highly indecisive, I took to the best resource out there… Social Media and Google. At the time, I was part of a chat group of mothers who had children born in October & November 2006. I posed the question to them. Like myself, they seemed a bit stymied. A few of them had gotten the same demand, I mean desire, from their children as well. We all thought our children were a bit young for this, but that got me thinking…
How old was I when I first received an allowance? Honestly, I am pushing 40 and can’t remember. I know I was a child—my first allowance amount, I do recollect. I received $0.25/week. Yes, you read that right, just a quarter! The excitement on my face when I received that quarter was pure bliss. After a few years, my allowance went up. Instead of one shiny quarter, I received two of them. Yes, $0.50!
But this was the 1980s. There were now 30 years of inflation to consider.
Back to the husband I went. I explained the responses I got from social media, which ranged from nothing to $10! (Okay, $10/week for a 6-year-old, hello people, what on Earth?!). I told him my finds on Google, which basically were the same as Social Media. It all depended on the source.
Our Decision
We decided to start our daughter’s allowance out with fifty-cents per week, but we didn’t just hand her the money. She had to earn it. Upon my many Google searches, I came across many chore charts. These charts were filled with things children should be able to do at their age. We sat her down and told her that she would need to clean up her toys and books, place her dishes in the sink, and keep her room tidy for her to get her fifty-cents a week. I know, not much, but we were only talking about two quarters.
This worked out well for the first few weeks. My daughter was very eager to get her money. One day I asked her, “Baby, what are you saving up for?”
“My Little Ponies! I want them all!”
Ah, those ponies that used to highlight my life in the 1980s now were the apple of her eye. After a couple of months, she earned enough for a pony. I brought her to Toys ‘R Us (may it RIP) and took her to the My Little Pony aisle. Her eyes lit up with pure elation. She picked one up and said, “This one, Mommy!”
I looked at the package, “Baby girl, this one is $10. You only have $6.”
She frowned. Like every 6-year-old, she needed instant gratification, so there was no waiting a few more weeks. There may have been a few tears and a few whines of, “But Mommy, I want this one. Please!”
I held my own and said she would have to wait until she earned enough. She didn’t like this and finally settled on a less expensive one.
The trouble was, once she purchased this My Little Pony, she became very lax on continuing to clean up. When the next week rolled around, she politely asked for her allowance. We looked at her and told her she wasn’t going to receive it since she didn’t do her chores. She was not happy. She threw a huge tantrum, and then we told her, “And you just lost next week’s allowance.”
“But Mommy, Now I Am Older!”
Fast forward a few years. My daughter is nine years old. Like many preteens, she became very clever and realized she was getting swindled with this now $1.00/week deal. One night at dinner, she begged us for a raise in her allowance.
“Okay, we both agreed, but now that you’re older, you need to become more responsible.”
(Insert eye-rolling) “Ugh, why?”
Ah, preteens. Gotta love them!
My husband and I had discussed this since her desires were becoming more expensive. Instead of $5 My Little Ponies, she wanted $20 markers. But of course, we couldn’t validate giving her more money without her learning to be responsible for it. Once again, it was back to good ole Google. More articles were read, more chore charts were observed.
What we ultimately came up with was that it was appropriate for this age to receive $1 a week as they were old. That said, with my daughter being 9, she would receive $9 a week for her allowance. Okay, not bank-breaking (yet!). But… there is always a but… she had to split the money into three separate jars: Donate, Save & Spend.
In addition to having these jars, she had to split the money evenly, which worked out well when she was 9. Once she reached $25 in the Donate jar, she picked a charity, handed me the money, and I made an online donation in her name. There were some hiccups initially with her sneaking money out of Save and Donate and putting it into the Spend jar. She complained about not having enough money for whatever item she wanted to buy at that current point in time. My husband and I explained to her that she has to realize that as an adult, you won’t always have enough money to buy something. That is what saving is all about.
Allowance At Age 12
My daughter is twelve now. She receives $12/week if she keeps her room clean, her bathroom relatively clean, makes her own lunch, feeds the cats, and folds her laundry. She is still required to split her money, but it is now an on your honor system. She doesn’t have to split it evenly but still needs to put money in all three jars each week.
Honestly, she has lost several weeks of allowance for not cleaning her room or having an attitude. She doesn’t complain about it though. She is learning the importance of saving money and giving to others in need. That is the most meaningful lesson we could teach her concerning her allowance.
It is all a choice. I know some parents who do not give their children an allowance because they should be contributing to the family by doing their chores. While I agree with that, I also feel like chores are like having a job. I get paid for mine. Why not pay her for hers? Whatever your choice, consider teaching your children about where the money goes. It’s not all about the material rewards, sometimes the best thing we could do is give to others or save it for something more important.
